So Valentine's Day is on my mind (and not the upcoming midterms and SAT (so I write this to get this out of my system so I can get back to the important stuff)). Every year, I always feel sad on this particular day because it's a constant reminder of me possibly dying miserably alone. It suddenly hit me, why do I have to put up with this? So, I'm deciding on doing something special for that day, something that will make others and me happy. I have no idea what, but it's gonna be awesome... I hope... Anyway, I've been thinking about what Valentine's Day means to the high-schooler. It means looks. In high school, looks are everything. Don't try to defend yourself because there are nearly no people in high school mature enough to actually appreciate another person's personality. So, in high school, Valentine's Day is a holiday celebrating the "beautiful" people, all the people in relationships and that can easily get into a relationship. I'm sick of it. For example, I'm a skinny kid. I mean, skinny to the point its ugly. People have actually told me that I have potential if I work out a little... Now, no one reading this can see this, but I'm infuriated just thinking about this. Exercise is good, I'll say that, but I do exercise. I do eat, A LOT. From research, I just have a skinny body type, ectomorph. It is very hard for me to gain muscle mass. I'm about 5'10" and weigh about 165 pounds. I'm not underweight, but I'm still very skinny. From what I've seen, for someone with my body type and numbers, it will require a very sizable effort for any noticeable changes to take place. I will NOT change myself so that I appease other people. I always have the option to change, but that is not who I am. My identity is the one thing that I can carry with me through my life, even in failure. When I fail, I at least know that I failed. I am disgusted that there is a celebration in which people like me just have to suffer because we were not fortunate enough to have socially acceptable looks or personalities and not willing to sacrifice who we are. The problem is, I really don't have it all that bad. Girls are under constant pressure to look a certain way. This part of society truly disturbs me. NO girl should be called ugly because she doesn't look like some photoshopped person from a magazine. The solid majority of the girls, who are so lovable personality-wise, that I know are beautiful young women. It breaks me heart to hear when any one of them says that she isn't pretty enough or doesn't have the confidence to approach a guy. These are girls who deserve great guys, but they are unfortunate to be high-schoolers in a public school system. These girls are beautiful and will find love outside of high-school, not because they'll change (I hope none of them ever will) but because they will meet the right people.
This is what I want to say, to tell them. I want to tell the real beautiful people that they're beautiful because society doesn't do that. I want to bring justice. But, I can't tell them out front; no, that's too easy (and a little creepy). I want to tell the beautiful people that they are beautiful because society does not tell them this, but how? It's not like I take pity on these girls; I sort of envy them, actually. They'll find love outside of high-school. I'm screwed for life. I just want to make things right. I can't be the only sad on V-Day, right? I want to make them happy, proud of themselves. I want to make them feel how they truly are, beautiful.
